I am jealous of all you people who have regular bowel movements. Do you realize how LUCKY you are? I was up all night trying to get comfortable as my body tried to move "stuff" through my bowels. It was heavy, it was painful, it was uncomfortable. My whole right side becomes hard, as everything tries to get past my cancer mass. Stupid cancer. Don't take your bowel movements for granted, People!! Distended intestines are not fun!
Oh! Another thing! There doesn't seem to be much awareness or fundraising going on for colon cancer. What's with that? Is it because it's all about pooh and passing gas? I say we reclaim our feces! Let's pass great wind and be proud! (oh man, I can't believe I'm writing about pooh....)
One more thing.... I found this article today and it had a very truthful and funny outlook on the whole 'dealing with cancer' thing. I haven't had any "sympathy vultures" to contend with, but the rest rings very true for me. I encouraged my family and friends to tell others because it was less work for me :) Here's an excerpt from the article:
"Make a Facebook status letting everyone know you have cancer. "Ewww, but I'm not an attention whore!" Hush, you blighted body! The only thing more exhausting than chemo is having a face-to-face conversation with everyone you've ever met about your battle of wills with a murderous tumor. So after you tell the important people in your life, make a public announcement. Otherwise, a lot of your casual acquaintances will bully you into long conversations because they want to be personally affected by your disease. These are usually the types who tell elaborate stories about their bad days; meeting a cancer patient is like meeting a celebrity to them. Nonchalantly noting the state of your health online helps deflate and deflect these sympathy vultures. In that same vein, tell your loved ones to openly mourn your bad news. I think my roommate literally told 50 people the week I was diagnosed, which was therapeutic for her and also saved me a ton of work."
from “Tips on Surviving Cancer” by Rebecca Pederson